March 6th - From my Journal

I have found that there are a lot of things in my life that I spend a lot of time on that in no way are important: Free online computer games, TV shows, etc.
It seems like I do these things because they are simple and mindless and relax me, but when I really look at them and how I feel, all they do is drain me and leave me with an uninspired, more bored, and unmotivated feeling.
I know I am far into lent, but besides journaling which leaves me refreshed and inspired, I think I am going to spend much less time online and more time reading and being outside and with my wife!
When it comes down to it, I want to live an inspired, motivated, deeper life!!!

March 5th - From my Journal

Have you ever felt helpless?
I feel that way a lot in my job as a youth minister. There are situation that happen with parents, church members, and even non-church members when I feel helpless.
One example was when I was in the office on a Sunday morning and an older man from the church started lecturing me on the idea that how I dress is ruining the youth of the nation. I know this was a bit of a stretch, but the idea that he felt it was his place to lecture me about this knowing full well I could not talk back without making it a bigger issue... I FELT HELPLESS.
When I am instructed to put on an activity that goes against my ideology and philosophy in youth ministry by a person who does not even go to my church, but since it was coming from the district lay person I have to... I FELT HELPLESS.
When I receive a call from a youth whose parents are fighting all the time, or they tell youth youth they are not good enough, or they keep the youth from participating in activities and community because they are worried what their child might share...I FEEL HELPLESS.
It seems that every week and sometimes everyday there are situations that come up where I feel helpless.
I know that in God alone can I have hope in the He is in control, that He is with me, that He loves me, and in the end He, LOVE, WINS!

Isaiah 40:27-31
"Why would you ever complain, O Jacob,
or, whine, Israel, saying,
'God has lost track of me.
He doesn't care what happens to me'?
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?
God doesn't come and go, God lasts.
He's the creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath.
And He knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
Gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
Young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait, [HOPE], upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don't get tired,
They walk and don't lag behind."

March 4th - From my Journal

It seems like it is so easy to make a list of the things we want to be better at, things we feel like we messed up, things we wish we were. Why it is so simple to focus on the negatives, but also so hard to make a similar positive list?
I wonder where this comes from because looking at children they seem to focus on the positives. Ask a child what they are good at and they will give you a huge list. So when does this change? When is the shift? When does our focus change from positives, what we excel at; to what we don't excel at?
I think that some of it maybe our education system. When a kids starts getting grades, he focus become what they need to improve, not what they got A's in. Society has decided that kids need to be well rounded and good at every topic and subject. I don't know anyone who enjoys every topic. Even those who get straight A's, they enjoy some classes and have to work really hard at others. All this does is teach kids they are not good enough at life. It says they don't measure up.
Why can't we focus on what we are good at and passionate about? What if each of us focused on our strengths and grouped with others with different but compatible strengths?
To me this is what Paul was talking about when he talked about the Body of Christ. Each focusing on the strengths given to us by God, having faith that God has equipped others around us to make the rest of the body. We don't have to be the whole body, and when we try to be we fail at what part we are created to be.

Lord, teach me that I am not the body, and train me to be the best part of the body I can be.

March 3rd - From my Journal

After writing for the past week, I have made several observations. Today I want to focus on one: Handwriting.

I think that handwriting is quickly becoming a lost art of creativity and expression. No longer do people write note, they text. No longer do people write letters, they email. No longer do people take notes on paper, they type them on their computer.

I think this is all very sad because handwriting can be such an expression of who we are. Take mine: I think it say I like things simple, so I print. It says I rush sometimes so it can get pretty sloppy. I am a lefty which means I hold my pen weird. My writing would also tell you that I am a bad speller.

I want to charge each of us with keeping a great form of expression and creativity alive: Handwriting.

I think I am going to try to not only write in my journal, but start note taking on paper and pen again...

LONG LIVE HANDWRITING!!!!!

March 2nd - From my Journal

I have to admit that at points journaling is a great release and pause in my day to sit and reflect. Other times thought, like right now, I struggle with where to start or even what to write at all.

I guess this is a part of maturing in this discipline, that even in the valley of writing, I must push through and try to enjoy even the struggles of feeling like I have nothing worth saying.

I do have to admit though, even now, uninspired, unguided, there is something about the act of writing in pen in a journal that guides your, or at least, my mind to PEACE.

March 1st - From my Journal

A lot of time we take life too seriously. We worry about things that in the big picture don't matter. We worry about things like what other people think, what we wear, how much money we have, etc.
On of the things we have been talking about in youth group is this idea of Communion, this community where all our focus is on God, and in this God is with us. In this Communion, we experience love, joy, and celebration, but also pain, tears, and struggles. The beauty of it all is we are experiencing what the Christian church is supposed to be. Tonight, we heard a talk about the soul that deep within in us is the part of us that truly knows God. Then we had the GREATEST DISCO EVER! Free from feeling like we need to look cool, not worrying about what others thought, but just having a lot of fun dancing to classic songs with a Disco ball!
I think the reason we worry about unimportant, trivial stuff is that we in a way have been taught to take ourselves too seriously...

Micah 6:8 - "But he has already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It's quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love,
and don't take yourself too seriously - Take God Seriously."

Lord, teach me not to take myself too seriously.